Today I’m serving first trimester, just dropped out of someone’s arse, green skin tone realness.
I originally wanted a smaller age gap for Riley and Baby 2, but hey ho. However now I realise Riley being a year older than I’d wanted at first is great! I’m lay on our recliner complaining because I’m gonna throw up, after throwing up, and rileys stroking my hair, stroking my belly, feeding me some 3 day old juice he found under the buggy. He’s even putting my slippers on for me! It doesn’t matter that I’d just took them off and told him I don’t want to wear them, it’s the thought that counts.
You ever want to just grab somebody by their shirt collar and just scream right in to their face YOU ARE SO FUCKING STUPID WHY ARE YOU SO STUPID. yeah.
Gonna post this publicly with a breakdown so everyone knows for any future needs they may have.
Right, first, benefits. I get £61.62 a week Child Tax Credits, £20.30 a week Child Benefit and £143.40 every two weeks Income Support. That’s £614.48 a month.
Since you’re moving into a council house, you should have a good standard of radiators and double glazed windows and insulation. That will cut costs down considerably for heating. If you get them both from the same provider and pay by monthly Direct Debit, this will also cut costs. One Income Support payment should cover monthly costs with leftover.
I know that a lot of places are going on meters for water and you *should* be on one. The start out is cheap and most likely covered by the leftover money from the one Income Support payment.
Food for us, a grown woman and a 2 year old, is £60-70 a month. We rarely buy treats because we don’t need them. Ariana is 9 months old, so won’t need larger portions, which will cut costs considerably. Your main part will be you.
Healthy Start vouchers will cover formula for a month with you spending a couple of pounds past that. Healthy Start will cover infant formula, including anti-colic and soy, all of which are fine for babies to drink up until a year+ (depending on the formula). Even if you don’t buy infant formula, it covers fresh and frozen fruit and veg as well as milk and you should be getting £24.80 a month until she’s a year old, which is a considerable amount off your food bill.
Tv is not an essential. It also will raise electricity costs considerably. Cut that out until you get a car seat and you’ll get there incredibly fast. You can watch tv on your mobile via websites and apps such as 4od and BBC iPlayer. Same with cable (Sky, Sky+, Virgin Media etc.). Unless you’re watching live tv, online or on tv, or listening to the radio (unless it’s via an app), you don’t need a tv licence and can easily go without and still watch.
Also, unplugging devices, especially chargers, can save a lot. Or turn them off at the mains. Since you have a mobile, you also don’t need a landline. And you could also go without internet until you’ve bought the new car seat. You could have also gone without the microwave, since that’s definitely not an essential and is actually quite harmful, which would have saved money.
Clothes are also non-essentials. Ariana will need new clothes every 3 months and then every 6 months after that, and doesn’t need a full wardrobe, or a whole new set every week. You can also go to charity shops or on swap and sell Facebook groups for your area, or Freecycle, or Freegle. A lot of the previous sized clothes will also still fit. You, yourself, do not need new clothes.
So the grand total. Let’s go high with gas, electricity, and water, and say £150 a month. Food, we’ll go high again and go with my monthly shop and go with £60. Let’s include the tv licence for kicks and include the £24 monthly. Since she’s recently turned 9 months, we’ll throw in £30 for clothes. £17pm for council tax. That’s £281 in a month. That leaves you £333.48 for things like internet (£20 pm), phone contract (£20 pm, or £10 pm if you’re on PAYG), extra bill money, and travel. You still have enough to buy a £130 car seat. And that’s if Martin never gives you anything towards Ariana (in which case you can call the CSA and you should get 15% of his wages per week). That’s all from a lone parent stance.
Besides, why are we even having to talk about this? She can fit in her infant seat until she’s around a year old. Isaac did and he’s in one of the top percentiles for growth. Which then leaves you 3 months to get the cash together. That’s £43.33 a month. That’s way more than manageable, ESPECIALLY if you don’t have a tv for 3 months. You could also sell things such as your laptop or old clothes. Also, how high a price is too high for your child’s safety?cositsusagainsttheworld
She squashes in her infant seat and the max weight is less than what she weighs? I don’t need new clothes? Up until today I had one pair if leggings, one pair of jeans, a t-shirt and a hoodie. Please…
What make and model?
Also, I have one pair of regular jeans and my back up pair. Which are maternity jeans. I have maternity tops as regular tops half the time. Or tops I’ve had for years. So I’d say yeah, your clothing “needs” shouldn’t be coming before your small daughter’s car seat needs. They’re non-essentials and considering you STILL should have hundreds leftover after a £5 pair of leggings/jeans, you can STILL buy that car seat.
I don’t need to discuss my child’s car seat needs with you. Wanna erf? Fine, but what’s it to you if I don’t?
Btw the council have a private sector where private landlords go through them to feel more secure, my house is not a council house.
Weeeelll you’re lying (again) and being a hypocrite (again) and you’re endangering your small child who is far more likely to break her neck considering her age. If you don’t want help, don’t spout all this bull. Going on the offensive doesn’t help either. And why not post it? I mean, if she definitely does go over the maximum requirements, why not show it? It just makes me think that that was a lie even more tbh. I’m not having a go at you ff, I’m calling you out on lies and stating facts.
Btw, that STILL means you should have a good standard of radiators, insulation, and double glazing. So it doesn’t really matter.
The maxi cosi seat she had goes to 9KG… Which is 19lb. Shes over 21lb. Do not call me a liar.
Also, you said you couldn’t afford to buy an ERF car seat and that £130 is too much. That is, in fact, a lie. As proven above.
This is all basically pointless. As much as I disagree with a lot that Kirsty does, this is getting ridiculous. Why are you picking apart the finances of someone you don’t even know? Especially when you made a post earlier today saying you can’t afford food.
I’m sick of seeing this malicious bullshit.
Fuck you so hard.
All my love,
Jada Pinkett-Smith is aware of the critics that frown up their noses at the way she raises her daughter, Willow. Willow cuts, dyes and styles her hair as she pleases, a fact that bothers many who feel girls shouldn’t have that much control over their appearance at such a young age.
Jada decided to address the criticism in a Facebook post:
“A letter to a friend…This subject is old but I have never answered it in its entirety. And even with this post it will remain incomplete. The question why I would LET Willow cut her hair. First the LET must be challenged. This is a world where women, girls are constantly reminded that they don’t belong to themselves; that their bodies are not their own, nor their power or self determination. I made a promise to endow my little girl with the power to always know that her body, spirit and her mind are HER domain. Willow cut her hair because her beauty, her value, her worth is not measured by the length of her hair. It’s also a statement that claims that even little girls have the RIGHT to own themselves and should not be a slave to even their mother’s deepest insecurities, hopes and desires. Even little girls should not be a slave to the preconceived ideas of what a culture believes a little girl should be.”
I’m pretty sure I’ve reblogged this before but seriously this is something we should be teaching all our children. Their bodies are theirs, not ours as parents. As soon as you tell someone their body doesn’t belong to theirs you take away so much from them.